updates on toes and the drama of the foster care system

Bug's toe is doing better. He is running and jumping and climbing all over the place. I am pretty sure that when we see the foot doctor on Monday he will be giving me good news. In the mean time we are keeping the brace on and trying to limit his running, jumping and climbing...trying is the word. Not working very well. I am just glad that this didn't happen during the winter because we have not had Bug wearing any socks on the sore toe and if it was cold....his toe would be frozen.

Things with Squeeker continue to be a drama. After finally getting hold of the case worker a week ago (this is a new case worker)...visitations with his birthmother and her boyfriend (possible new husband) on Wednesday of this past week. This was the same day of the trip to the ER for Bug's toe and I had to call Dispatch at the DSHS office to explain to them that I could not drop off Squeeker by 1pm for the visitation because of the emergency. When we got home, Bryan rushed off to work and I put Bug down in his crib...he had passed out at the ER from the pain meds they gave him. I called the case worker and then he came to my home and picked up Squeeker for the visit. It was now about 1:45pm. He told me the most upsetting news yet that I have experienced with this whole Foster to Adopt roller coaster of a ride.

He told me that there was another relative that has popped up that wants to take Squeeker. I asked if it was a relative on the birthfather's side, he said no. I asked if it was the birthmother's side...he said no. I was confused. He then said it was the birthmother's current boyfriends brother. You should have seen my jaw drop. What The? This person has no more connection to this child then Bryan and I do but he can just take him if he passes all the back ground checks and stuff? What is this world coming to? To be honest....I was not a very nice person to the case worker and I realized that I was about to loose it when I stopped myself and took a deep breath and tried to ask how this could happen. The case worker is so confusing and makes no sence to me at all. I was even more confused just by him talking.

He took Squeeker to the visit and did tell me before leaving that he would be bringing him back and that the visit was probably going to be later since he was late getting him to the visit (It should have been from 1-3 but it was going to be more like 2-4). At 4:20pm I called Dispatch and asked if Squeeker's visit was done and if the case worker was bringing him home. The worker on the phone said that the visit was going tell 4:30pm and that yes the case worker would be bring him home afterwards. By 5:20pm I was getting a bit nervous and worried. We only live 3 miles from the DSHS office. I figured in my head that the most amount of time it could possibly take would be 30 minutes. Time to get Squeeker to the case worker, time for him to get him out to his car, and loaded up and then time to drive to our home....probably hitting all the stop lights because of rush hour traffic. Even though we only live 3 miles away we must have 20 stop lights between here and there. But at 5:20pm still no Case worker and no Squeeker. I tried to call the case worker, no answer. I tried Dispatch, closed- after 5pm. I tried calling the front desk, closed 5pm. I even called Squeekers old placement caseworker's cell phone hoping she might have the new case workers cell phone number so that I could try to call him, but I just got her voice mail. I probably sounded like a FREAK on the message because I was really upset. I was paceing all over the house. Crying and just all upset.

At 5:30pm the case worker finally showed up with Squeeker, and I told him that I was worried...he said that Squeeker was sleeping so soundly that he decided to get some work done in his office before coming to bring him home. I told him that I would have appreciated a call, because I had to call to see when the visit was done and then when he had not showed up with him almost an hour later, I got to worring, and it made it even worse that I could not get a hold of him. I asked for his cell phone number for the future.

Bryan then called the case worker on Thursday and asked him to please clearify the situation about this non-blood relative. Bryan figured out that this case worker has not even confirmed that they are married yet. That he is just taking their word for it and does not have a marriage certificate proving they are married. He told Bryan that he would ask them to bring proof. I guess yesturday (friday) the case worker told them this and then the case worker called our home while I was out at the Donation Station (picking up some free clothes for Squeeker and Bug- because I am a Foster parent and an Adoptive parent), and told Bryan that he asked them if they were married and they said yes, and he told them to bring proof.

So I guess there is a new law passed in the state of Washington, that the word Relative Placements can also be related by marriage not just blood. If Squeekers' birthmother is married to this guy then this guy would be his step father and the relative interested in taking him in would be his step uncle. Rediculous. If Squeeker was older and knew this guy then "Yes" I would agree with the idea, but he doesn't even know this guy. Has had no relationship with this guy. Squeeker is only 1 month old.

So that is it. If Squeeker ends up going (I hate the waiting and the not knowing....this is going to be a very long weekend) then I told Bryan that I can not and will not do this again. I need to protect myself and I can't emotionally go through this again. Bug will be an only Child. Sad but I will not do this to myself again.